Peni, 50+ years

March 2009

The best thing I’ve found or discovered at You’ve Gotta Have Friends is the overall acceptance and freedom to be exactly who I am at any given time and to be appreciated for spontaneous feedback. 

I was touched by Linda asking for a hug and the feeling of acceptance and being valued.

I can honestly say over the course of life I always wanted to be normal and to belong somewhere.  Y.G.H.F. is about connection and feeling like you belong.  I never felt like I belonged or was accepted.  In actuality I feel like I belong with people associated with Y.G.H.F. staff and the people who drop by the office.  I carry a thread that is connected to everybody.  I first experienced this connection and acceptance at a Y.G.H.F. dance.   The experience was that I felt no need to feel self-conscious.  I could clap my hands, express the joy of being alive, it was the most exhilarating feeling I can ever recall experiencing.

“Belonging is a degree of acceptance that relieves all my fears of rejection.”  There is a generosity of spirit in the office and with the people I interact with there.

“Belongingness”.  I experience a role in community as a counselor. As an acknowledged counselor I am given respect around official roles and at Y.G.H.F. I can shed those roles and take off all my hats and Peni the “person” is accepted for who she is, which is such a relief!  I experience it as a shedding of roles or labels and the core Peni gets to be present and accepted.  All aspects of me are given permission to be present.  I can be a real person here.

What brought me across the doorway?  The first connection was the conference in 2007 and my second connection was being invited to sit on the Steering Committee.  The essence was that it was inspiring because it was real people in real life (warts and all) wanting and deserving to have much more openness, acceptance and welcoming.  I was inspired by the visioning of the Steering Committee, to meet a group of people who shared a common vision.  I have to feel “real” and an energy in a day to day application.

The Steering Committee holds the dreams and hopes for the community in a visionary way in a planning, collaborative envirionment.  It is necessary to experience the practical application of coming to the office, the reality and truth unfolded on a street level with very real people.  I get inspiration from the Steering Committee and my fuel from what actually happens in the office.

I am aware of how many more people know me by name and that I know a minimum of 50 new people in the community.